Anybody that knows me knows that I LOVE everything pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. It is my passion, my fire, my calling.
I was so fortunate to have a healthy, pretty easy pregnancy with my daughter. I loved and cherished being pregnant. I have a beautiful, perfect daughter, but when she was about 6 months old I started thinking about how much I missed being pregnant, missed my belly, missed growing a human being each step of the way. As much as I wanted to be pregnant again, I knew that my husband and I were not ready for another child yet. That's how I started thinking about surrogacy.
I've never known of anyone that was a surrogate or even needed a surrogate, but the more I thought about the idea, the more I was intrigued by it. So, I started doing my research.
I wanted to find out about the risks, the benefits, the compensation, and any other possible information I could learn.
Before starting this journey I had so many questions:
○ Could I really give myself shots every day?
○ What if something bad happens?
○ What if I I couldn't have any more of my own kids?
○ Can I carry a child for 9 months and not grow attached?
○ Will the pay make it worth it?
○ Do I really want to dedicate a year or more of my life to this?
By luck, big brother, fate, or whatever you want to call it, I saw an ad on facebook for this surrogacy company. In the ad it said that they had a quiz on their website to find out more about surrogacy and whether it was a journey that was right for me. After taking the quiz I got a call from their director of surrogate outreach who talked me through her journeys and how she felt when she was a surrogate. While she couldn't answer any of my personal questions, she did put my mind at ease by talking to me about how she felt when she was faced with the same questions.
While I felt better about my uncertainties, I still had to talk to my husband and see what he thought about it all. In his usual fashion, my husband was, and still is, immensely supportive. I remember one of the solidifying moments when we were talking about it and I said "what if something goes wrong and we can't have anymore children of our own in the future?" And his response was "then we'll adopt". He said it with such ease as if it wasn't even a question. That simple confident answer showed me that I could do this and that I really do have the most amazing husband.
I love my daughter more than anything. She is my whole heart on the outside of my body. While it truly brings tears to my eyes to think about how much I love my daughter and that another family will have the opportunity to know that love for their child, the altruistic reasons aren't the only reasons to do surrogacy.
I also looked at how much the money could impact my family. That money can be used to save for buying a house in a few years, towards a second family vehicle, and for a nice family vacation that we wouldn't have been able to take otherwise.
Surrogacy really has the opportunity to change two families lives. An amazing family that will get to bring a new addition, or two, home to love and cherish forever and my own family who will be forever changed for the better.
If you are thinking about surrogacy or have any questions, research, google, look for facebook support groups, and talk with your friends and family about your questions, fears, expectations, and aspirations.